Born to Blossom, Bloom to Perish

I have this strange peace when I re enact how I’d break up with you in my mind. I don’t know if I’ve tried too hard to make this work or if I didn’t try hard enough. I didn’t think my requests were that hard too do. Or that they were so awful, but you make them out to be. You make it seem like I expect you to check in with me. No, once again you’re turning what I asked into something completely not true. I don’t want to be that girlfriend but I’m scared to death to be cheated on, to be left and to be rejected. We clearly know why… Because the first man ever in my life did 2 out of 3 of those things. And he did 3 out of 3 things to my mom. I honestly don’t know what to do. Kind of ironic The Break-Up is on tv right now. I can totally relate to how Jenn Aniston feels. I just want him to want to care, to want to work on this relationship… To just want me, issues and all. I’m scared to lose you but I don’t know which to follow…. My head or my heart.